The biggest negative impact on performance is an attitude of pessimism. And not many things make a bigger impact on our attitude than the language that we use. When we treat adversity as PERMANENT (this always happens to me), PERVASIVE (this is going to ruin my whole day) and PERSONAL (this happened because Im no good), then we set ourselves up for pessimism and poor performance. When we use language that is Temporary, Specific and External, we start to make a difference.
This is based on the groundbreaking work of Martin Seligman who continues to get amazing outcomes using his methods.
Lets break this down for a second and look at the alternatives:
PERMANENT vs TEMPORARY
This always happens to me. This essentially says that there is no use in trying to change it because it will always happen.
This doesnt usually happen. I wonder if theres a way I can change it next time. This actually puts some optimism in the conversation and forces us to look for ways to change the future outcome.
PERVASIVE vs SPECIFIC
This is going to ruin my whole day This puts you in a terrible mood and often makes associations based on flawed logic. Just because you got a bad phonecall in the morning, doesnt mean that the whole day is going to be ruined.
Oh, well, this will create some other opportunities This language puts us on the lookout for a positive event and stops us using the negative perception as an anchor for future events
PERSONAL vs EXTERNAL:
This happened because Im no good This deals, like the other language, in absolutes. If you are no good, then whats the point in trying? This will keep happening regardless of what you do, so you dont bother doing anything different.
I wasnt able to do that because I didnt have the skills for that situation. Now, this is something changeable. If you dont have the skills then you can acquire them. It can be different in the future.



